I need a ruling . . . letting people in

Here’s one that has perplexed me for a long time. I need a ruling on the question of what is the most “courteous” course of action in the following situation. For some reason I find myself thinking counter to conventional practice on this matter.

I’m on my way home from work, and for reasons I’ve never been able to explain, traffic always seems to get worse in the spring. There is a particular traffic light on my commute that gets notoriously backed up. I’d say anywhere from 60-80 cars wait at the light in one lane, and about a dozen make it through at each green light. So the train of automobiles meanders back for about a quarter mile.

Now, the thing is, there just happens to be a 7-11 at this intersection. And, as you might imagine, during this busy time of day, motorists are exiting the 7-11 parking lot to get back on the road. To do this, they must turn onto the busy road that I am on, entering the traffic just before the light, and ahead of the 60-80 cars that are already waiting there.

You’ve been in this situation before, haven’t you? To be “courteous,” drivers allow people in, that is, they allow them onto the road from the 7-11. But by doing so, this just makes the traffic situation worse for everyone else.

So here is the question that riddles my mind. If I am nice to one person wanting to get on the road, am I not at the same time being rude to dozens of people behind me who have been waiting patiently for much longer than the 7-11 exitee?

If I charge right through the intersection without letting the person in, I may appear rude to that person, but in fact, I am being courteous to many people. And in a sense, I would just be “being fair” to the one person. After all, if they waited for seven to ten minutes to get onto the road, they would have waited just as long as everyone else.

In a nutshell, the way I think about it, I am being nice to 60-80 people, instead of showing special treatment to one. The “greater good” concept seems to apply here, doesn’t it?

You might be wondering what I really do in practice. Well, to be totally honest, a lot of times, despite my bold intentions, I “chicken out” at the last minute and let the person in. But believe me, I’m not happy about it. A few times I have stuck to my guns and not let the person in. But in these cases, I: (1) have felt a little like a jerk for not letting the person in (despite what I have reasoned here), or (2) have noticed that the next guy behind me lets the person in, so nothing is really gained anyway.

So as I see it, unless everyone subscribes to my logic, nothing will really change. And such a change, of course, will never happen. But please tell me that I at least have a valid idea that the “better” course of action is to be courteous to the many rather than being preferential to just one. At least I can be right in theory.

I need a ruling . . .