The Naked Blog Entry

Over the past generation, I’ve noticed an increasing infatuation in our society with the word “naked,” and it has gotten worse over time. The Naked Gun. The Naked Chef. The re-released Beatles Album “Let it Be . . . Naked.” I remember an ad for a fitness company a few years back asking, “Do you want to look better naked?” Nickelodeon's teenage rock band "The Naked Brothers." Naked naked naked. I don’t remember the word being flung around so much when I was a kid. In fact, I think I was even reprimanded once for saying the word in an inappropriate setting.

Well, for me, the past few days have been the proverbial straw that has broken the camel’s back. After church on Sunday my family went to a restaurant where I encountered not one, not two, but three “nakeds” on the menu. There was “naked burritos.” There was “naked taco salads.” And then there was a beverage refrigerator labeled “Naked Juice.” Call me old-fashioned, call me a prude, but I’m just not very comfortable with the combination of “naked” and “food” in the same place, especially in a public restaurant.

Then, on Monday morning, I heard a D-J on the radio state that his nickname is “Naked.” Wow, how special is that? Of course, if you watched VH-1’s recent countdown show “50 Things That Guys Do That Make Them Undateable,” you’d immediately know where this guy falls.

But you might be saying to yourself, “Get your mind out of the gutter, Dave. The word naked doesn’t just mean ‘without clothing.’ It can also mean emotionally exposed and vulnerable, or even plain, simple, and stripped of all pretense.” Okay, I realize that the definition of the word has several nuances. The re-released “Let it Be” album was stripped of all of its (originally unintended) studio overdubs. The “naked burrito” comes without some of its normal ingredients. But this doesn’t account for every instance. After all, do you really think the fitness company wants me to exercise (with their equipment) and eat right (according to their nutritional plan) so that I can look better when I am emotionally vulnerable, exposed, and stripped of all pretense? I’m going to say, “No.”

Actually, I think that there are two interrelated circumstances going on here that help to explain the expansion of naked in our collective vocabulary.

The first is the ultra-competitive marketing that takes place in our ultra-consumeristic society. There are tons of companies, organizations, and people out there that want your money, and they need to grab your attention in order for you to buy what they’re selling. Part of this process entails the use of provocative or “interesting” words in their advertising. The word naked naturally causes people to turn their heads, and once they’ve got your attention, they hope you will investigate further and eventually buy their product. Some of you might be reading this blog entry because you read my “ad” on Facebook, saw the word naked, and were intrigued enough to click on over here. Another good example of this phenomenon, by the way, is the word “extreme.” How many products can you name, right off the bat, that are “extreme” in some way? Like, for some reason, my shoelaces have worked fine my whole life, but now all of a sudden I need to go out and spend my hard-earned money on X-LACES—Extreme Shoelaces. What’s up with that?

The second, and as I said, interrelated idea, is that there seems to be a continual quest, mostly through advertising and media, to introduce and proliferate the next naughty word, or “forbidden” act, or “taboo” topic (usually sexual in nature) into our collective consciousness. Some of it is on trashy television talk shows. Some is slowly introduced over time via commercials, movies, and TV shows. I remember how a year or two ago I watched a movie from the 1980s that was rated “R.” I don’t even remember what movie it was, but I do remember thinking that that particular movie was not as bad (in terms of profanity and sexual content) as most PG-13 movies today. This is certainly not true across the board, but I think you get my point.

Now, I am not trying to claim too much about the wide use of the word naked. It is not signaling the impending apocalypse or anything like that. I would just point to it as one example of this need for some (advertising, media) to play to our more base emotions. And, I wouldn’t even say that I’m looking at the word naked as pornographic, per se, but rather as a provocative word that has a “naughty” connotation. Yes, I know it has other definitions, but I would submit that at least one large demographic in our society—I’ll call them “males”—almost immediately think of one, and only one, definition of the word.

So there you have it (dare I say it?)—the naked truth about yet another thing I think about on the way to work. And by the way, I ordered the chicken nachos and a soda. No naked food for me.