Showing posts with label bad grammar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bad grammar. Show all posts

Friday, March 26, 2010

Am I asking too much?

Consider the following brief quiz:

1. Who is on the ten dollar bill?

2. What is the first line of the Erie Canal Song?

3. What state is Vice President Biden from?

4. Complete the saying, “To the victor goes the ________.”

5. What is the length of one term for a United States senator?

Did you get them all right? Did you think the questions were difficult? In my estimation, these questions should be pretty easy. Maybe the Erie Canal Song is a little tougher, because that song is slowly slipping out of our national memory (as is the case with many of the songs of our heritage, but that’s another subject for another day).

Over the past few semesters, in the course of lecturing in my American History class at the local community college, I have asked these questions to my class. In each case, I was met with silence. Nobody knew the answers. Zero students in a class of about twenty-five. I wasn’t surprised that everybody didn’t know the answers. But I was dumbfounded that nobody knew.

It’s not that I think my students are stupid or incapable of learning. I honestly don’t think that’s the case. I try to take a little time to get to know my students, and all of them are capable of learning at a high level.

Why, then, do the students, a majority of whom are in their late teens or twenties, not know these things? As I recall—and I’m trying to be as honest as possible here—when I was a teenager, such facts were commonly known, or at least more commonly known. Vice President Mondale was from Minnesota. Vice President Bush was from Texas (that’s more obvious now since he and his son served as President). Ulysses S. Grant is on the fifty dollar bill, and Benjamin Franklin is on the one hundred.

The next question, naturally, is that if this is in fact a valid observation, then why is it that young people today don’t know these things? The answer to this question is no doubt the subject of many books and journal articles. In my view, there are some deep-seated problems not only in our educational system, but in our culture in general that contribute to this problem (a loaded statement, I know . . . perhaps I can address it in more detail sometime).

I notice this phenomenon not only in my teaching, but in many other areas of life. The problem rears its head in matters ranging from common knowledge, to historical facts, to bad grammar. For instance, I recently ran across two Facebook pages, established by American youths. One explained that what parents view as “back talk” is really just “kids explaining why their wrong” (how about “why THEY’RE wrong”). As for the other one, I don’t recall the specific subject, only that everyone would “want to be apart of this.” Hmmm. I could see myself being a part of something. I could see myself being apart from something. But how do I be “apart of” something?

It’s as if the movie “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” is coming to life . . . Teacher: “Who was Joan of Arc?” Ted: “Uh, Noah’s wife?” . . . Teacher: “It seems to me the only thing you’ve learned is that Caesar was a ‘salad dressing dude.’”

So here I am ranting. It just seems like many things that used to be common knowledge no longer are, that poor grammar and spelling are ruling the day, etc., etc. And it seems to me that the average fifteen, or eighteen, or twenty-two year old ought to know better.

Am I asking too much?

(Quiz answers: 1. Alexander Hamilton; 2. “I got a mule and her name is Sal, fifteen miles on the Erie Canal”; 3. Delaware; 4. spoils; 5. six years)

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Stupid Song Lyrics: Salute to bad grammar and made-up words

On the second Wednesday of each month, the Quackenblog will feature a segment called “Stupid Song Lyrics.” I will begin today with some of my favorite instances of bad grammar and made-up words in popular music. And let me tell you, there is so much from which to choose (I almost said “there is so much to choose from,” but we all know that sentences should not end in prepositions). Anyway, enjoy.

1. Paul McCartney, “Live and Let Die.” Lyrics: “But if this ever-changing world in which we live in, makes you give in and cry . . . live and let die.”

From where did these lyrics come from?

2. From another classic rock song:
"You know that it would be untrue,
You know that I would be a liar,
If I was to say to you,
‘Girl we couldn’t get much higher,’
Come on baby, light my fire."

The “if” in the third line introduces the subjunctive tense, which, conjugated properly, is “if I were to say to you.” Hey, Jim Morrison, was you absent in English class that day?

3. “’Cause I speak of the pompitous of love.” From Steve Miller Band, “The Joker.”

One thing that I’ve learned in life is this. Some people speak of the pompitous of love. Others speak of the pompitous of hate. Still others speak of the pompitous of peace, healing, or even conflict. And the thing is, you can’t do anything about it. That’s just the world in which we live in.

4. The BoDeans, “Good Things” says:
"Oh no no, don’t pass me over,
Oh no no, don’t pass me by,
You see I can see, good things for you and I."

I always have to think about this one, but I believe it should be “good things for you and me,” not “for you and I.” In fact, me is certain of it.

5. From the Commodores funky 70s hit “Brick House”: “She’s the one, the only one, who’s built like an amakazon.”

I don’t know what an amakazon is, but I’m sure you could order one on amakazon.com.

6. Many of you may be unfamiliar with a country song from the 1960s by Roger Miller called “Dang Me.” It is a funny song, with the following line: “Now roses are red, and violets are purple. Sugar is sweet, and so is maple surple.”

I have always heard that nothing rhymes with purple, orange, or silver. But that didn’t stop Roger Miller. He has done the impossible. Let this be an inspiration to all of us.

7. Diana Ross, “Upside Down”: “Round and round you’re turning me, I say to thee, respectfully.”

Actually, there’s nothing grammatically wrong with this. I just like her unabashed use of the King James English. Gutsy move. Diana, from a long time Supremes fan, I say, thou possesseth moxie!

8. One word: Sussudio. As in, “There’s a girl that’s been on my mind, all the time, Sussudio.”

In 1985, Phil Collins gave us “Sussudio.” I don’t know what it means. I found conflicting explanations on the internet. One source says it was the name of Collins’ daughter’s pet horse. Another says it is the sound that a drowning person makes when splashing around frantically in deep water. Neither makes sense in the context of the song. I think “Sussudio” means something more like, “the final recording gets mixed next week and I haven’t finished my lyrics yet.”

I look forward to the November installment of “Stupid Song Lyrics,” when I will explore the nonsensical lyrics of one of the most famous singers of our day.