My story . . . Part 6 of several

There are certain things in life that, when they happen, you can never go back. That is, you can’t go back to the way things were before. It was only over the course of time that I could process what had happened to me in 2000 and 2001. As I did, two very important questions came to my mind. And as I’ve said before, the answers to these questions have caused me to think differently about almost everything in life.

The first question is: Why me? That is, why was God so good to me by giving me a second child, and healing him from what multiple doctors said would be at least some level of brain damage? I know couples that have tried and tried for years, yet are not able to have any children, let alone two. I know couples that have a physically or mentally handicapped child. Matthew has no handicap. And, I know couples that have had the terrible experience of the death of a child. These are all people that I know personally. What had I done to deserve a beautiful, healthy son? All I had given to God was an attitude of selfishness and arrogance. I came to realize that I deserved none of the good things that God had given me in this situation. None.

Over the years, this realization has caused me to contemplate two words a great deal: grace and thanksgiving. Grace is when God gives us something that we don’t deserve. Thanksgiving means having a deep sense of gratitude. I can say that this experience has given me an appreciation that I did not previously have about God’s grace—particularly the gracious gift of His Son, Jesus Christ—as well as a determination to be thankful for every last thing that I have, no matter how seemingly insignificant.

The second very important question is this: Now that this circumstance had passed, what should I do about Hebrews 11:1? Is this verse, teamed with other things that the Bible teaches about faith, meant to be taken off the shelf, dusted off, and used only during those rough patches in life? Or is something more involved? Is faith as described in Hebrews 11:1 something that should be applied to every area of my life? It did not take long for me to realize that if the latter was the case, it could have enormous implications. I mean, if I really believe that God is who He says He is, and that His Word is true, then total trust in Him might lead to some very uncomfortable questions: Should I sell my house and move? What career should I pursue? How much or little money should I make (and does that even matter)? What if I sense God telling me to make a major life change, and I can’t see how I can do it?

Now, in case you were wondering, I went into this experience as a sinner, and I came out of it a sinner. So if I’ve given anyone the impression that I am now perfect, I am sorry. That is far, far from the case. What I can say is, that over time, I have grown to the conviction that Hebrews 11:1 is not simply my magic genie in a bottle that I can call upon to get me out of a jam. My goal in life is to make Hebrews 11:1 my lifestyle, that I would have faith—real faith—in God in every matter in life, no matter how big or small. And I continue to pray that my faith in God be the evidence of what I can’t see.

Starting in 2002, things started to happen in my life that put this principle to the test, so to speak. It would take several more episodes of “my story” to recount them all in detail. But rather than do that, I will wrap up my story with one more episode, in which I will talk about three specific things that have transpired in my life since 2002. I think, and hope, that by describing these three particular circumstances, you will get a taste for how God has picked me up as I was walking in one direction, and placed me on a different path—a path that is indescribably exciting, even though I can’t see how it is all going to work out.